Too Deep For My Errand Run

 ^Look at'em. Lol!^

I've joked about it before, but I see now that it's kind of a fact. If you're feeling kinda funky or even a little bit bummed, and a Drake song comes on, he can bring you down. Suck you right into his world!!! God forbid it's one of the top 3 bummer tracks on the Take Care album. Worst part is that it's pretty legit.... too legit to quit. (Yeah! I said it!) Now I've got it on repeat and, ugh.... now I'm sad. Crap! Might as well put on Sam Cooke's "A Change Is Gonna Come" and cry his heartache into a glass of cheap wine. What's wrong Sammy? Who hurt you!?

Listen to this link if you dare:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j-X9JkM9Bgo

*whispers* You're welcome. ;D

1990's Gone Wild

So I was listening to this new radio station the other day that just plays music from the 1990s. Awesome, right? Yeah, I know! I was a 90s kid, (*shakes cane) the best generation. I was driving along in my car, thinking about being a child of the 90s, and then I thought.... What if I lived all the way to the 2090s? People are often living longer lives these days and who knows what medicines they'll have if I make it to my 60s. Some people go sky diving on they're 90th or 100th birthday, cause they figure, why the hell not. Well if I make it to the 2090s, let's say 2098, I'll be 111 years old. I'm throwing a Double 90's party for my old ass! Anyone can come! If you're another 90s kid then you're VIP. I'm gonna play C'mon N' Ride It(The Train) by Quad City DJ's and do cocaine. If I'm still kickin' after a few songs I'm gonna continue to play up-beat, dance-able music, only from the 90s and rave it out til I can't no more. Open bar, bouncy house, petting zoo for me and all my peeps. (I will have somehow saved up my social security.) I love to jump & dance like a buffoon to bassy music, so hopefully I'm still able, maybe with my robotic limbs powered by vegetable oil. LOL! The moral of this story is, WHY THE HELL NOT? It would be a public service, cause surely by then I'm a burden to myself. I get bored pretty easy.

P.S. Quad City DJ's also did the song Space Jam for the movie. ;)

Pinterest Shame

Omgoodness! So I've been trying to get myself and my comedy out there. Checking out sites I've been too proud to use because of my "ideals". (My blog is only new because I'm either lazy, forgetful or both.) Lately though, I've been a noob on way too many sites. I set up my... "Twitter", I believe the kids are calling it, and now I have a Pinterest account. Now, I've avoided sites like these cause I obviously didn't think the world was ready for my awesome, and I felt these sites are too time consuming. Well here comes the shame... Pinterest is pretty damn addicting! I spent 3 hours on it the 1st day. Even worse, I didn't fill up my boards 1st with funny or deep things. My whole 1st day I got stuck on hot guys and beautiful celebs. What's wrong with me... Oh, Joe Manganiello is what's wrong with me. Giggity! ;)

Don't worry. Today's Pinterest was more thought provoked and personal.... maybe.

Awkward Protocol

LOL! OMGoodness! Have you ever had a most rare moment where you and a stranger do something at the exact same time and it's awkward? I don't mean like the common, oh, we were trying to go through the door at the same time, or we were walking towards each other on the same side of the hallway, and now we're stuck in an awkward time loop of, "oh, um, I'm sorry, excuse me, stop following me!". I mean like what just happened to me at the public library. I was walking away from the counter after checking something out, and as I went to walk away, we went to clear our throats at the exact same time. Now I know what you're thinking. "It's not a big deal, Maybeline. People cough." Well, it's not as if we were complete strangers sitting in a lobby somewhere and sneezed simultaneously. There's atleast guidelines for that. It's followed by a simultaneous display of manners ("Bless you" or "Gesundheit"), and then a short chuckle of understanding as you both look back down at your phone or Cosmo mag. *Polite eye contact optional. NO! I come here often, we know each other's faces. When it happened she made an audible pause before continuing to cough more, and for some reason I paused mid step. It was surprising, because I think we both thought... we had become one. But during that second of pause we soon realized that that was ricockulous, and just didn't know the protocol since I was sure she saw me, just  as she was sure I heard her. I know this because I made a worse mistake. When I went to turn and sit, I glanced up at her and we made knowing awkward eye contact. Should I invite her for coffee? Will she call after today? Hmm... I should go.